What started as a short story about the decision whether to have another baby, turned out as war and peace and a post about how my life panned out!
Click HERE to go to the end of the post if you can’t be bothered reading! 🙂
I always had a plan when I was a kid. maybe I was influenced by fairy tales or too many soppy movies, but I had my future planned out.
Step 1. Get a girlfriend.
I achieved this on a few occasions but only when I met The Mrs did I know, I didn’t need to search any longer. Step 1 was complete!
Step 2. Get engaged.
Once step one was complete and I knew she was the one, it was only a matter of time before step 2 was also in the bag. It seemed I needed a little nudge to complete step 2. A combination of vast amounts of alcohol and the desire to prove a point was all it took one night in a working mens club in Wales. My romantic side hasn’t really got much better than that! (For the record I did re-propose to renew our vows many years after we married, while up the Eifel tower, romantic right?…….she said no.)
Step 3. Find a home.
When we first got together the wife and I lived in a flat, above a chemist. The flat was great. Big, cheap and at some stage or another we lived with friends and had a great time. As our relationship grew and our friends moved out to avoid the inevitable ‘third wheel’ syndrome, we knew we wanted to buy our own home, make it ours and stop throwing money at a rented place. We found our home in a 3 bed semi-detached in a not very desirable place, but it was a good price, out-of-the-way and seemed perfect for us. We lived in that home for about 9 years and even began step 5 in that very home. But first….
Step 4. Get married.
When we first got engaged, we jokingly set ourselves a target wedding date. At the time it seemed AGES away in the distance, many years away. Only when it was a little over 12 months away from that eventual wedding date did we decide that we would stick to our word and get married as planned. We had a small but very cool wedding. We were married in an art gallery (Which we found by accident), had a reception in a little family run hotel and it really was an amazing day. Highlights of which included:
Seeing my nephew dressed in a suit.
Watching my wife to be walking down the isle on the arm of her dad.
Seeing The Mrs sat with her feet up showing how she’d changed her footwear during the reception to much comfier trainers.
Watching my sister hike up her skirt and stand in our empty whirlpool bath, trying to figure out how to get it working, only to find a switch later on.
And of course the journey to my mother-in-laws bedroom, led by my father-in-law, to check she was OK, because how would we know unless half the wedding party went to check at 2am? It was like a drunken Schrödinger’s cat!!
Step 5. Starting a family.
When you are together a while you start getting questions from family and friends. When you getting engaged? Then, when are you getting married? Then, when are you starting a family? After quite a few years of being married and doing all the things we wouldn’t be able to do with kids, such as travel, go out at the drop of a hat, go out for the day without taking spare clothes just in case somebody is sick. We decided the time was right to start a family. We’d known people, including family, who had varied experiences when it came to starting a family, so we were both nervous to even try. But, after around 6 months, it happened. We were expecting. I can’t help but smile at the thought of us both laying on a bed in a hotel in Goa, wondering if this was it. Should we say anything to those we were on holiday with? It turns out it isn’t easy thinking of different excuses for you not to drink alcohol when staying in an all-inclusive hotel on holiday, somehow The Mrs managed it. As soon as we landed, we drove home via a shop to buy a test and as simple as peeing on a stick we started the journey of parenthood.
That’s where my plan stopped. I didn’t know if I would even get this far, let alone what would happen afterwards. After Step 5 AKA Benjamin, we were kind of just living life and seeing what happened.
Step 5b AKA Samuel came along and we continue to love and live our lives but the questions never stop. No matter how many kids you have, the question will always crop up…having anymore?
Hello to those who couldn’t read all that and clicked the link! .
I’d be lying if the thought hadn’t crossed our minds, but thanks to my sister-in-law we now know the answer.
Nearly 9 months ago, she introduced us to her baby boy and since then we have seen him grow quickly and develop just as we saw our own boys do.
As she has now gone back to work, it means Baby O is staying over at ours some nights and last night was the first. It really was like stepping back in time while I rocked him back to sleep at 3am. It served as a perfect reminder that we’ve been there and done that and we are unbelievably happy with the amazing family we have. We don’t want to start again. Of course if we have any urges to have baby cuddles, we can always depend on Baby O to supply them.
I love it when a plan comes together.
Thanks for reading.